Level 5 - Life Stories
This Level 5 page contains encouraging life stories of people's journey towards God
LD Was Abused and Involved With Spiritualism
I was brought up in a small town called Barry in South Wales UK, by my Mum and Dad until the age of 7 when my Mum decided to leave myself and 5 siblings with my Dad. My Dad remarried and so more siblings were added. There were 12 of us in all.
From the age of 10 to 22, I endured physical, sexual and mental abuse from my Dad, my uncle, my brothers, my sister and my husband. I started self harmin at the age of 10, just now and again until it became every day. My Dad spent a few years in jail for his crime. I hated my Mum for leaving, because I thought she was the reason why my Dad was abusing us. I wanted so much to kill my Mum, I used to think of how I could kill her. When I was 14, I met my Mum and we talked about why she left. She left for things that my Dad done to her that are too sick to even repeat in here. My Dad had many affairs and fathered 4 more children, one of whom i have met, the others i haven't met.
I had taken my first of many overdoses at the age of 11, I fell in love at the age of 15 to a man who was ten years older than myself. I had two abortions and two miscarriages. I thought for many years that God had punished me for taking the lives of two babies.
Everything was wonderfull for the first year until my husband's drinking got worse and worse. He had a problem but would never admit it. I would be so scared a lot of the time, because when ever he drank he would get nasty and abuse me physically, even to the point of trying to kill me on a few occasions. 'Why stay with him?' I would ask myself. Well I kept thinking one day it will stop and eventually it did. When my third child was born my husband was in work and his best freind had become a Christian, we were invited to a Pentecostal church up the valleys one Sunday and my first reaction when i got there was, can't we just go in the pub next door? Thats ironic thinking considering my husband's addiction but it was that or church. He chose church I chose pub, but he won, so we went into the church. He got saved and when we walked to the train station he started singing 'Jesus wants me for a sunbeam.' My reaction to this was, I can see you becomeing one of those nutters. He stopped drinking and the abuse stopped. Praise God.
At the age of 25, I had my first encounter with a demon posing as my dead nephew. This was the start of my interest in the occult. How did I know it was a demon, not my dead nephew after you're probably asking. Well because I was dared to ask it to reveal its self in Jesus name, and see what happens.
I would do an Oujia Board. I would speak to my so called nephew every night, one time he asked me to invite other dead spirits and so I invited them. I started attending the local Spiritualist Church, started meditating, done Astral Travel, automatic writing. I found myself talking funny languages,and was told by a Medium that I had the gift and power to heal people and contact the dead and I should persue it.
She asked me to be a speaker at the Spiritualist Church but I told her that I wasnt much of a speaker. I wanted to only give messages to people in the streets. That Medium became my mentor and I would go to her for advice, help, healing and prayer. At one point in my walk I felt ill, had no energy, felt like I was walking on a different planet. I asked my mentor what was happening to me. She said, 'Lyn it's because your spiritual antenne is wide open and the spirits of loved ones are trying to come through to you. I made my own tarot cards, by the power that was in me. All this was done in secret, my husband never knew and still doesn't to this day how involved i was.
My self harming went from cutting, then burning, to starving myself. I stopped eating for two years. I was so thin I could feel my spine when ever I sat down. My body ached all the time. I had a vision which I now know was from God, it was of a young girl sitting on massive court room steps, with her head in her hands crying , a woman walked passed her and said, 'Whats wrong little one?'She said, 'My Mummy has died.' That shook me big time because I could see it was my daughter. I thank the Lord for that vision.
I had attended a Baptist Church a few times, with my husband at the time, but always kept my distance from the Christians, would never allow them to lay hands on me or pray for me. My husband then got baptised and I was nagged to get baptised also, but I said it wasnt right to, that I wasnt a christian, but they kept saying it's not fair that your husband is baptised and you arent, so a few weeks later I got baptised. The next day I wanted to kill someone. Someone who I had met a few times and is now my best freind was walkin towards me that day, and she said I have something to share with you. I said, 'Yeah, ok, what is it?' She said, 'The Lord has shown me a picture, it's of a valley and you are in the centre. On both sides of you, is an army both fighting, their arrows going over your head, not touching you. In the distance is a light and that light is Jesus. He wants you to go to Him and keep walking towards the light.' I said to her, 'What ever!' Bless her, she even drew it for me.
Interesting thing was one of the woman who nagged me, I later found out that she was a lesbian and committed suicide a few years later.
The voices I was hearing were stronger and more destructable, they wanted me to hurt people. When ever I was out, it got so bad I had to sit on my hands to stop myself. On a few occations they would give me orders to kill someone, it seemed I was out of control. I was arrested while on my way to kill someone.
I was able to put a face to the voices I heard, they were of young people, old people, children, every time i mentioned my nephew to my Christian freind she would say, 'Lyn its not your nephew, those are not dead relatives, they are all demons.' I said, 'Dont you dare call my nephew a demon and how do you know they arent loved ones passed over?' She said, 'Lyn I dare you the next time you see your so called nephew to tell him to reveal himself in Jesus name!'
So one night I did. He changed from a young child to this hideous thing! My face would change when ever the spirits inside me took over. I had been seeing a shrink because of me hearing voices and seeing things and they put me on many medications but none seemed to work. I used the tablets to overdose on many occations and spent a lot of time in a mental hospital always on suicide watch. The professionals had a meeting about the medication not working so they decided to try ECT electric shock treatment, twice a week for 6 weeks.
I have to admit a few times I was convinced to say a prayer to Jesus, I would say a prayer with someone then when i got home I would self harm and continue with Spiritualism. I realise now that the Jesus I was talking to was the Spiritulist Jesus and that's why my life and heart never changed.
I left my husband after 28 yrs of marriage because he had fallen in love with someone else. I know what you're thinking, 'But he is a Christian, how can he do that?' Well, the enemy couldnt cause him to fall through drink, he wasnt a womaniser and the only way to bring him down and break up a home was Poland every year to go into the schools and prisons to preach the Gospel, but the enemy found a weakness in him and he was deceived. Because of my mental state I had to sadly leave my 5 children and home behind for my childrens safety. I wasnt safe to be left alone with my children. I had lost everything and had become homeless. I became more bitter,angry and hated my life.
I had realised that my life was being destroyed. There was a price I was paying for walking in darkness. I was eventually given a place to live which was lovely but because of what I was invloved in, I had invited many spirits into my home. I was never one to be scared of anything that was of the unusual but this scared me and so I slept with the lights on.
I had a vision of me standing in thick black treacle and couldnt move my legs, within two days it had risen to just below my knee, I told a Christian freind about this and she said, 'What happens when it gets to your throat? You wont be able to breath.' It worried me for a bit then I shrugged it off and forgot about it.
On 13th March 2012, a freind of mine sent me on Facebook a You Tube video of an Ex-Spiritualist- Laura Maxwell, but I couldnt bear to look at this womans face, let alone hear what she had to say! On 27th March 2012, I was looking for a video on a well know Spiritualist Medium and came across a video of John Cramphorn who is an Ex-Spiritualist. I thought ok lets just see what this man had to say. I watched it and discovered that we had a few things in common. I emailed him and I was supprised to have an email back off him. He had suggested to his freind that she send me her testimony, I couldn't believe it when I saw who his freind was, yes it was Laura Maxwell ! So I thought, ok why not, let's have a look to see what she has to say as well. I couldn't believe it. It was like she was saying a lot of my life! She would know what I'm going through, but I couldn't give my life to God. I owed the spirits so much, I went to bed wishing I was in John & Laura's shoes, but thought everything was hopeless.
I woke up on the 29th March 2012, and I thought I would play some Christian music that a freind had given to me, this made me so ill, so i went to bed, had a bad dream and wolk up. I started playing Christian music and again felt ill, so i said to myself, 'Enough is enough, if I carry on like this I will be dead in a week!' So I turned everything off and sat in silence, then I called out to God and asked Him to forgive me and accept me as I am. I cried for two hours. He heard my cry. I said to God , I need to know you havIi had been accepted, I said 'OK God, I know I'm saved and yours but what about my way of thinking, my believeing that the spirits I see aren't dead relatives? He gently said to me, 'It's not about you, it's about Me.'
This angered the spirits, the nightmares got worse, they became a nightmare to live with. I attended church with my freind and everytime I would feel so uneasy, I would end up in the toilets self harming for an hour, the last time I went to church I spent the whole time in the toilets self harming.
I have got rid of all my occult stuff, turned my back on all my involvement in the occult and darkness and now walking in the light!
10th of April 2012 i went for ministry, this was very hard but it was worth it, I was supposed to go for deliverence the week after, but things got so bad that the ministry team felt it should be brought forward, so on 13th of April 2012 I went for deliverence. It took a good few hours but praise God it was so worth it, I am now free! I no longer hear the voices! I feel like I have lost 20 stones, my freinds have said that my face looks so much brighter and even my voice has changed! I feel so much peace. I thank my Lord Jesus Christ for the freedom He has given me!
I thank you for taking the time to read this and my prayer is that if you are reading this and you are involved in Spiritism then please get out of it. Jesus Christ of Nazereth is calling out to you, it's not by chance that you are reading this, its by Gods divine appointment. If you are also reading this and you are going through anything that I have mentioned in my testimony, then know this - that if God can help me and get me out of it, then He will and can do the same for you ! Its willpower, your will and His power!Jesus died that we might be saved, set free and be forgiven. Amen. " L D.
FOR MORE TESTIMONIES AND HEALP ABOUT SPIRITUALISM, READ Laura Maxwell's story and watch Laura Maxwell's Youtube channel.
